Home Again...

During our holiday to the Coast, we all suffered through a heat wave the likes and lengths of which I've not, as far back as I can remember, ever felt before.  With searing temperatures up to 40C, each and every day, the normal activities of life were abandoned for a deck chair in the shade of the big old Maple Tree in the back garden.

We all stood in Graydon's little plastic pool. At one point, there were four adults and little Graydon all squished standing together, attempting to gain a little Cool from the rapidly warming Water in the pool.

We had a relatively quiet trip to the Coast; it was not until we arrived at Chilliwack that the traffic backed up to a crawl. The joys of travelling in the Summer are not all they are cracked up to be...car accidents and road construction had us joining the ferry lineup with one minute to spare. But we made it; that's all that counts, in my book!

My daughter and I visited the Vegetable stands at Naesgaards in town, after dropping my granddaughter and her friend off at Sproat Lake. Brianna is so very fortunate, indeed, to have a set of grandparents who live right on the Lake, with the extreme weather the way it was.

Naesgaard's is a place I loved, as I grew up. They sell the best Corn on the cob I have ever tasted, bar none. Every year, I would visit it, always coming away with some stunningly beautiful Vegetable that would grace the family's dinner.

I could not resist buying bags of Tomatoes, Peas, Beans, Carrots and Corn and Potatoes. Is there anything quite as beautiful as crates of freshly picked produce, at their very most luscious? It's the very taste of late Summer, to me.


In the evenings, we could see the smoke from the fires, just over the Mountains to the East...just a bit, just enough to know there would be plenty of smoke to greet us when we returned home.

And if the anticipation of breathing difficulties to come were not enough for us to worry about, we were given plenty of time to work out any concerns. We were caught in traffic jams from Departure Bay all the way to Abbotsford...a distance of some 80k. 


It took three hours of driving very, very slowly in 36C temperatures. I was grateful for Air conditioning in our vehicle and felt deep sympathy for the travellers in convertibles and older trucks and cars. It must have been hellish, if the red, perspiring faces of the passengers were anything to go by...


After solving the World's problems during the long time spent crawling along, Graham and I stopped (finally!) at our usual motel and continued our trip home the next morning.


It was hot. Dry and smoky and yes...almost itchy. The very Air, filled with smoke particles, bothers my skin. And I re-learned how to breathe in the smoky Air...short, almost panting breaths.


Once again, I am becoming accustomed to gray/brown days. The green of the Coast is becoming a distant memory, one to be brought out when I am in despair over the misty, smoky flavour of the Cariboo.


There are tales of heroics amongst the fire fighters, each of whom deserves my gratitude. Fences and barns may burn, yet not one house has succumbed to the flames. Stories of wayward cattle and predators abound.

The smoke from these Fires has reached Alberta...I was told Williams Lake and its Fire Storm was on the front pages of Calgary's newspapers.


I don't know how long these Fire Storms will continue...there doesn't appear to be any let up as yet. We need Rain. Wind only fans the Flames and dry Lightning Storms don't help at all, only beginning new Fires.


It is as if the Fires have their own minds.

A lady told me how, on returning from her own holiday, she could not see the City of Williams Lake from the outlook on the highway. She thought to herself...Where is my town? It looks as if Fire and smoke have swallowed the town...


And so, with this tale in mind, I began a new story yesterday, where Fire takes on human characteristics. In my story, Fire takes over an entire country, leaving behind a black, evil space with twisted, burned creatures...a little dark, perhaps, but oh! so much fun!

It is always interesting to me to see where the stories I write will go...it is not as if I have any real idea at the beginnings of the writing of it.


I find it strange that something so drastic as a Fire Storm and the reports surrounding such a disaster would titillate the creative muse. 

But perhaps the mini holiday and the relaxation I have just enjoyed had something to do with it...

RAIN!!

After what seems like an eon, Rain has arrived. Not enough, though, to put out the Fires which have Williams Lake surrounded, but it will help, without a doubt. It has dispersed the smoke and that fact alone means so much.

I can breathe...deeply and often. When Air is filled with smoke, one tends to take short, shallow breaths. As a consequence, oxygen going to the brain is less and tiredness, anxiety, confusion and a whole host of other maladies result.

It is such a relief, as well, to have the Forest dampened down. It will not be much Rain; the forecast is for warm weather to arrive once again. But oh! it felt heavenly this morning to walk through the garden.

The Dogs, too, are having an easier time of it. During the smoke-filled days, they wouldn't go outside and laze in the shade, as is their wont. They would pant if they were outside for any length of time. During my research on what smoke does to the physical system, I learn that is how Animals breathe in smoky Air...by panting.

I hear on the news about Animals milling around on the highway, confused and disoriented. Sightings of big game and Cattle are everywhere a Fire is burning near.

So, with the Rain, my greatest wish is, as their breathing patterns change for the better, that all the Animals who were displaced find another home outside of the Fire area, even if they have to travel great distances to do so.

It will be easier for me to leave on a trip to the Coast, now that some Rain has arrived, as well. When conditions were as terrible as they had been, leaving the Dogs behind felt a little disloyal, even though they love our dog sitter, and rarely even miss us.

And I was greatly worried about Fire breaking out near where I live. Even though that fear may arise again, since Fire season will be on-going, conditions are such, on this day, that the fear has gone on the back burner.

I am thrilled to see my family again so soon after they were here. It only joins us stronger together, each time we see each other. It will seem as if we are a part of their ongoing lives, when visits are closer together, rather than the distance we must traverse each time a visit occurs. A visit, in that case, must take a lot of time playing catch-up. This time, we have already caught up.

Today, even the thought of the long car trip and the subsequent tiredness on my return can't shake my feelings of joy. It is like coming out of a long, dark and very stuffy tunnel. When I was in it, it was all I could see or feel and it felt like it would go on forever.

But today there is Rain.

Inner Barometer

After a hot, dry and Windy Summer, Rain has finally arrived. I woke to the sound of Wind and Rain beating against the windows this morning...and I will be forever thankful for it.

If the weather never changes, life, for me, becomes rather humdrum. There are not many people who dislike constant Sunshine, but I am one. Perhaps it is because I grew up on the Coast, where lashing, cleansing Rain is very common. Sun is the one who hides on the Coast.



Lifelong residents, here in the dry Interior of the Province, begin to dislike Rain after a couple of hours of it.  I've lost count of the number of people I've run into who comment very strongly that they've had enough! It is beyond their imagining, I think, that one could actually enjoy the slipping, sliding drops of Rain which fall with such unerring accuracy upon one's body...the ones which find an opening in outerwear and tickle.


Rain has some disadvantages, for us, at the moment. We are in the middle of placing utilities in the new Woodworking Shop Graham is building. This includes digging a trench from the house to the Shop, in which to place gas and electricity lines.


Well. For the first time in months, the Heavens opened on the day the closure of the trench was to occur. Rain fell in sheets...not just for a short time, either. 


Our contractor had already dug the trench previously. The gas and electricity lines were in place. On this day, since UV rays can affect the cover to the gas line, it became imperative to close the trench quickly.


But it had begun to Rain in the aforementioned sheets.


The Soil, over the Summer, had shrunk and dried with not a teaspoon of Water anywhere close to the surface. I personally thought the contractor would have no problem for hours, even with the torrent of Rain.


But within seconds, the Soil had turned into a gluey, slippery  slick mess. It clung to everything...my shoes gathered the mud, giving me at least six more inches in height. The excavator slid from side to side, trying, without success, to gain purchase.


All within minutes. The excavator gave in...to tackle what should have been a simple fill, another day. Soil here has properties all its own.

During the same Storm, Rain held Graham back as he struggled with placing the panels of metal for the roof. A hole had been cut for the chimney, letting in Water, which leaked upon the stove. Again, there was some measure of urgency which required him to be on the roof, in heavy weather.



There was danger involved here, however, and I am sure only Graham's extensive Mountain and Rock-climbing experience brought him down safely. My heart was in my mouth as I watched, even as I intuitively knew he would be alright.


More and more moments of pure "knowing" are occurring these days. Perhaps they were always there and I am only now becoming proficient at drawing upon them, but lately...!


I have discovered I have only to visualize a thing...and it arrives.  If I am looking for something and ask for help, I will find it within minutes. If I want a person to call...he or she will get in touch. It felt odd, at first...and now I mostly accept each occurrence with an extension of gratitude to the Powers-That-Be.

Yet, these are all, without a doubt, small things...small miracles. Big things, things which have many strings attached, are beyond my ability.  I cannot stand aside for these things, as yet. If it matters to me a great deal, I tend to meddle in the purity of the vision.


But the pure "knowing" if an event will turn out favourably or badly...this ability seems to never leave. It is an inner barometer.


Just now, the weather barometer calls for more Rain.  Thunder and Lightning is predicted.  But just at this moment, Sun has found a break in the thick, dark cloud cover...and has shown what Rain has really done.

Every item, from our home to the lowliest Bush, shines and sparkles, water droplets winking and blinking their scintillating smiles everywhere.



Mother Nature has been cleansed and rinsed clean.

Otherworldly Dreaming

I look outside this morning, and there is nary a cloud to be seen. Sun's warm rays brighten Daffodils' shiny, eager faces even more, making them shiver with delight.

Red Tulips, sensuous in their silken cups, line the path, sending a siren's scent, lingering...overpowering at times, soft and gentle at others. They seem to preen themselves with Sun's rays even more than usual, this morning.

Sun chases the last vestiges of a soul-speaking dream I had last night; the message given has not been deciphered as yet...

Sodden, it was...dripping and gurgling, sloshing and splashing...I was in a world of Water. I was not in my cumbersome physical body, I was only an eye, an eye that was ever aware of each nuance of the droplets of Rain and flowing streams that surrounded me.

Objects and Beings that came to me in my watery World shimmered silver at times and became gauzy grey at others, obscured by bubbling froth. My Soul's eye recognized these incandescent energy signatures, connecting with each as it passed through in a small whirlpool of wavering thought.

There was the Cat, sleekly gliding through heavy moisture, his eyes burning into my Soul, telling me to be aware, offering protection from deceit. Eagle, a frequent enough visitor in my daylight hours for me to nickname him Scree, glided by on a stream of Water, offering me the gift of farsightedness. He tells me his tales of prosperity and success...he tells me not to fear failure, for without failure there is no success.

An avalanche of Pebbles and Stones floated by, each turning and winking a bright light, each a warm bastion of strength in this uncertain watery place I found myself in. My spiritual guides for this journey had arrived.

I became a slithering droplet of water, with the ability to adapt and become entirely mutable, independent of other's words and thoughts. I experienced the silky sensation of runneling down a Flower petal, gathering with other droplets in the heart of the Flower.

I became a Raindrop, freezing into a Snowflake. I joined other droplets, gathering in pools, small and large. I entered the Ocean, tasting the brine. I kissed the tops of Trees, before running down to invite their thirsty roots to drink.

I became a Tear, sliding down a downy baby cheek, or gathering in the deeply carved fissures of an elder's face. I learned that different Tears for different Beings feel the same.

I tasted hard baked Sand and Dirt; I gave a small, insignificant flower, a survivor of neglect, a kiss to nourish its weak growth. I wanted to give it hope.

I fell through pollutants and tasted acid, making my soul curl and shrivel up in disgust, sadness and fear.

I merged with a dewdrop, I extinguished a burning forest, I slaked the thirst of a runner...

I opened my unconscious, closed energy and allowed it to flow freely, allowed it to be submerged and cleansed in the Water of Life.

But when I became aware, in my dream, that I was dreaming, I felt my body return, my guides leave, and I knew I would soon waken.

I am a Pisces; I dream of Water often. It is an entirely comfortable place for me to be. It is the first time I have experienced being a drop of Water, however. It is a difficult dream to describe...feelings and emotions were fleeting, hard to catch and hold. Always, Water in my dreams reflect my emotional status... so what did an insig- nificant droplet of Water have to tell me?

A glimpse into another World, it seems.

I would awaken to the sound of Raindrops being driven against the window by a strong Wind. Without a doubt, I thought, the morning would bring clear weather.

I snuggled in, leaving otherworldly dreams behind...to be dissected in the morning.

Weather Sensitive

Sometimes, more and more often lately with the aberrant weather patterns in Qualicum Beach...I wake up with my body aching. I feel swollen, skin hot to the touch, stiff and sore.

This malady has everything to do with what's happening with the weather. For as long as I can remember, I've known the weather is changing by the way my body is reacting.

Many times lately, I will get up out of the warm, soft, absolutely comfortable bed, and try to lessen pain by walking around. But it feels, when I walk, as if I am slogging through an oozing bog. It feels as if there is resistance to movement.

Sometimes, I feel as if I might be on the receiving end of a migraine attack. If Wind is howling, as it has so often lately, asthma and wheezing occur. This is when my chest feels tight, I have trouble finding enough air to breathe...I almost feel as if I were under water. With small, shallow breaths, anxiety occurs...a kind of free- floating form that has no basis in fact. My tissues swell, sometimes. There is a definite feeling of being under a heavy substance, one that is pressing hard on my diaphragm.

Biometeorology is the study of how weather influences people. It is the name given to an ancient science that has become new again, with advanced technology that can evaluate air mass configurations. It is becoming a popular field. But there are naysayers...it will always be thus, of course.

I know many people who know of someone who is weather-sensitive. There are many stories of an elder Uncle or Aunt who could predict weather changes with such accuracy that outdoor events were scheduled according to the pain in her hip. Many stories abound about our forefathers utilizing weather indicators, including intuitive body signs. Still, these are just myths and legends, scientists say...much more data needs to be collected before they will endorse the correlation between weather and man.

However, in Europe, the weather services there use daily public advisories to inform people of more than 40 ailments believed affected by climate activity. Illnesses warned against include allergies, stroke, psychoses, general achiness and malaise, migraines, along with the obvious...heat and cold related illnesses. Much the same information appears on the weather channel I use on the Internet, but it takes a back seat to other information.

My allergies get worse during sudden cold outbreaks, when there are below normal temp- eratures, strong, gusty winds and a rapid rise in air pressure. I have learned to read a barometer very well in preparation for pain.

I find that quickly approaching weather fronts and rapidly departing ones, contribute to a migraine attack. And strokes...French researchers have found there were fewer strokes suffered in warmer months and more strokes where there was a temperature drop five days before. The theory is temperature drops may affect blood clotting, thereby increasing stoke risk. Sudden, extreme winter cold can result in hyperventilation, stroke and heart attack, by making blood 20% thicker than normal.

Chinese Emperor Hwang Ti, in 2650 BC, believed that "hot weather strengthens the heart, while cold weather weakens the lungs." Hippocrates advised his students "Doctors who want to know their patients had better know weather." Dr. Benjamin Rush, an 18th Century Penn- sylvanian physician, stated "Great and sudden (weather) changes may be considered the principle causes of disease in this state".

And Dr. Joseph Hollander, in the 1960's, as an Arthritis specialist, built a two room, airtight chamber, where his patients underwent various degrees of pain, while he adjusted humidity, temperature and barometric pressure. I wonder if Dr. Hollander himself was weather- sensitive. I can't imagine the extreme pain and terrible discomfort his patients felt.

Weather is one of the most basic of daily stresses the human body experiences. Frequent climactic changes bring new situations our bodies must adjust to. Changes in the barometric pressure, Wind direction and velocity, humidity and pollutants all affect our bodies, endocrine systems, nervous systems and cardiovascular systems. It seems to me that how well I feel at different times is directly related to what's happening in the atmosphere.

Both our dogs can forecast the weather. The signs of an incoming Storm will find them both pointing their nose skyward, with definite fearful body signals, such as lowered heads and ears, and tails tucked between their legs. This behavior is noticed long before the Storm actually arrives. Other animals such as Corn Snake or Iguana, if confused by weather signals, will double-clutch, where they will breed twice in a year instead of the normal once.

I don't require corroboration by the scientific community to know what my body endures when the weather patterns change. There are scores of people who, upon entering their middle years, find that what were minor twinges all along, are now not so mild in reaction to weather changes. The human body is a finely tuned instrument...it has much to tell us, if we will only remember and listen. And accept our intuition as truth.

Shamans of old long ago forecast the weather with nothing more than the signals Mother Earth sends, and nothing more than their own bodies as sensors. They were extremely accurate, by all accounts.

There is so much information inside of ourselves, just waiting to be reborn...re-membered. I am learning to find those senses we are all born with, and I am learning to trust those remarkably amazing signals my intuition sends me.

Science and research on weather sensitive people is just telling me what I, and others, have known all along. The scientific community feels it must prove the body is affected by weather patterns, by exhaustive research and collecting of data. It changes nothing; other than making sure I have a healthy diet, use exercise and reduce further stress inducing factors, I will still react to the weather...

And there is not much I can do about aberrant weather.

An Anniversary Storm

A year ago today, my Dad died... taking his final journey alone, as we all do. Within hours of his death, however, I felt him with me. And as today wore on, once again I felt him close by.

In Thoughts On My Dad,
I write about my relationship with him.

On this day, the anniversary of his death, a Storm is raging. It seems fitting, somehow, that the extreme weather seems to punctuate the vast difference in my life from a year ago.

I am writing this by hand, as I sit in Dad's chair by the fire. The power keeps going off, and I hesitate to use the computer during Wind and Rain's vicious assault. I have a lovely, aromatic Beeswax Candle lit, and it flickers a little as the flame catches a draft.

I feel a little like a Writer from the past, with my Book and Pen and Candlelight.

This morning, just as I awoke, Lightning pierced the darkened sky. I closed my eyes, in immediate self defense, but not before the Light pierced deep into my brain. The Lightning before and behind my eyes became a rhythmic orb, vibrating within me even with closed eyes. And then came the long, low rumbling of Thunder...at first sounding as if he had just woken in a grumbly mood...and then taking on strength until he totally enveloped the world with his roar.

The house shook! The dogs whimpered and barked, scurrying for cover, beside themselves with fear. Graham and I were no longer sleepy. And the thought raced through my mind that Thunder sounded a great deal like my Dad, at times. Was Dad perhaps sending me a Good Morning?

The power is off now, seemingly for good, this time. It has flickered on and off, with loud bangs in the distance, for awhile now. I hear the familiar whine of the fire trucks, ambulances and police as they race through the Storm.

The dominance of Wind's power is becoming frightening, even to me, who revels in very strong, shrieking Wind. Trees whip back and forth high in the air, almost doubling over before the fury of the Storm. Wind drives sheets of water through the air, picking up moisture even from the saturated Earth.

My Dad and I once watched a Hurricane from the living room window of the home where I grew up. The Storm exhilarated him; I remember how happy and open he seemed with me that day. We shared that stimulating, thrilling joy at the power of Wind. This special memory is important to me; there were all too few of them, it seemed.

The power has been off for hours now. Our covered Glider-Lounge, Patio Tables and Chairs and various potted plants took flight, as I watched in astonishment from the kitchen window. Held in the arms of Wind, they were gently laid to rest about fifty feet from where their place is. Even the glass from the Patio Table sailed through the air, landing softly, intact, on the concrete sidewalk. I feel I am being guided through this long assault from the Storm.

Telephone lines are down. I have placed candles on many surfaces...the table, counters and shelves. I hear the house creak, reeling from another punishing gust of Wind. I fear for Grandfather Tree; he has been hit by Lightning twice, over the course of the years...will his strength hold through this onslaught?

A year ago, my father died, unleashing a storm of change, in all of his family's lives. It seems fitting to have a wild Storm on the anniversary of his death.

The Wind and Rain have not abated. I am hearing stories from neighbours that the highway going into Port Alberni, where Mom lives, has been closed. I am hearing stories about flooding...3rd Avenue, the main "drag", is flooded, with cars and logs floating in the rushing 'river'. Many main roads are closed, due to horrendous flooding. The people have been assaulted by Hail, Snow, Wind and much Rain, as have we. I know there is no power there.

I last spoke with Mom early this morning, before phone lines were cut off. She had been without power for a couple of hours at this point...it is now pointing towards late afternoon. And it is now that I cry for my Dad...I yearn for his bull-headed strength.

My mother's chair is electric...and the chair was left in an upright condition. A belief she has that one can, under no circumstances, move to a bed during the daytime, left her sitting in that position. With no TV, her daytime companion. Another belief that one does not read during the day leaves her with very few options. Mom is clinging to her routine, I know she is, even if I can't reach her. It is her security blanket.

Perhaps my Dad was bull-headed for a reason.

I cry, too, for the restrictions that have appeared in my life, with the responsibilities I have taken on with my Mom. It has enriched my life in so many ways; but it is hard. And tiring.

Sometimes, I become overwhelmed. In this moment, I want my Dad back, just so that he could shoulder these responsibilities once more...

But the light returns...Wind is abating somewhat. I have cleared the drains at the road; our house was almost flooded, at one point. A watery Sun peeks out for just a moment...a return of Strength and Hope.

I laugh at myself...are there not so many gifts I have been given, as I seek to form a relationship with my mother and therefore, myself? These are far more numerous than the tiredness and the restrictions on my time. A little give and take...

Thank you, Dad.