Sunday, May 08, 2011

A Thoughtful Spring

Graydon and his tongue!
It feels like ages since I've written...and when I look at the date, it is. Time is speeding up these days; there doesn't seem to be enough of it to get every last item on the to-do list struck off.

And...Spring has not let coolish weather deter her. My old friends...Ligularia, Hosta, Poppy, Tulips...are not growing as quickly as I'd like, but growing they are. Today, after a long wait, after a period of time where it only Snowed, it's been Raining. I love every precious drop!

I felt so homesick after our last visit to the Coast at Easter. We had such a great time, seeing all of them...

Pretending to choke...ahh, Graydon!
The family is, every one, doing well; we missed Barb and Bryan, who were off on a Hawaiian cruise. Brianna began her new job last Saturday and has really applied herself to her school work. Graydon...ahh, Graydon! He rarely smiles for the camera anymore; instead, with his eyes dancing, out comes his tongue. Each and every time! What else would a four year old boy do? I find him very handsome, regardless.

Brianna and Keauni (I think!)
The whole family descended upon my daughter and son-in-law's home for a superb Ham and Scalloped Potatoes dinner for Easter. The twins were adorable in their first Easter dresses...yellow and beribboned! I was so impressed with my grandson Graydon...there was absolutely no sign of jealousy, as he gently stroked baby arms and legs. At that moment, he fell in love with Kaleelah and Keauni, just as all the rest of us have.

Our sad Lucky with his Bear
Upon our return to the Cariboo, we found Lucky sleeping on furniture, trying to find comfort, I imagine. He's never done that before. He also confined himself in the garage, by nosing open the door, and did a fair bit of damage to the car parked inside and the door...

Poor old Puppy. I knew it was much too soon to leave him after Nate's death; yet plans had been made. It will take him awhile to relax again, to not have his nose stuck to my jeans..

Anybody remember the But an' Ben?
We welcomed visitors from Scotland shortly after our return from our Easter holiday. It took me only a short while, this time around, to tune my ear to the Scottish accent and sayings. We were the lucky recipients of a book as a hostess gift...Maw Broon's But an' Ben Cookbook. I'm not familiar with Maw Broon, but I listened to the memories the book brought back for Graham. In perusing it, I find many Scottish folk tales within, not to mention some great recipes such as Nettle Soup, which requires a glug o' cream...

Nettle Soup!
It feels to me like change is in the Air...more change than only transitioning into Spring. Do you feel it? It was so difficult to leave the Coast...not just the family, but also the Ocean, the gardens and Flowers. The green.

It is time, now, to make plans to move back home. Heartache for something so much a part of me...the Sea Coast and coming to an end.

There is no rush, heart soreness notwithstanding. We will look carefully at all options, this time, before we leap. I am anticipating the planning, sometimes so much more exciting than actually doing the event. I am aware of the amount of work moving entails...

But there is more than just a change of residence, I think, within me. For instance, I have recently undergone a long dry period wherein I could not read anything of any content.
It's interspersed with stories and cartoons

I found myself reading magazines, anything of little matter, to lull myself to sleep at night. Yet, I continue to buy books...the pile of unread books on my night table is growing the hopes that soon I might want to actually read one.

I believe this odd behaviour on my part might be coming to an end. I have recently finished reading two books...The Room and Little Bee. Both of these are gifts from my daughter and both were difficult, in an emotional way, for me.

But both seemed to open the door for further reading.
Kaleelah and Keauni asleep (1 mo. old)

Not reading concerned me. It was such a transition from my usual conduct...I have always found time to read. Books were my salvation; they allowed me to live in a different World, in a different way. Books saw me through so many parts of life from which I wanted escape.

I was actually terrified I would go through the rest of my life reading seed catalogues and People magazine. This last period of not being able to concentrate for long on any written sentence was a lengthy one.

And I am so glad it appears to be over! But quite incidentally, the other day I met an older friend in a bookstore. She was looking confused, which, if you know my friend, is a strange departure from the normal for her.

She looked at me...What should I read? she asked with some anxiety...

I suggested any number of titles to her. None seemed to interest her. Now, my friend once loved reading and begat the other, she'd tell me, over and over.

Keauni? Heh!
I was becoming confused. Finally, she admitted to me that she'd recently found no interest in reading. She would pick up a book, she said, and find herself still with the cover closed a long while after she'd sat down to read.

I told her my story. We looked at each other, perplexed. She said...I wonder if it is because of all the short snippets I read and write on the internet? All that instant messaging and stuff? Short bits, here and there?...

I thought about it and finally, had to say I didn't know. I do the same on the Internet. But I know many people who don't let short bits of information from the Internet stop them from reading books with meaty content.

It's just a stage...I told her...A stage in life with too many other things on your mind. It feels like that with me. It feels like I can't settle...

Kaleelah and Keauni
She wasn't convinced. She left the bookstore with a pile of magazines and said she was happy she could still concentrate on those. Later, after I'd thought about our conversation, I was sure she felt her age was also to blame.

And there's another transition. Sixty was a turning point for me...all of a sudden, I have more confidence than I've ever had. And I can't explain that, either.

Change is a part of life, of course. Many times throughout my life a sojourn I feel comfortable on comes to an end and another begins. I can't foresee any of it. 

Purple suits the two of them!
For me, the best thing I can do is accept each day, each change as it comes. If I can't concentrate on the written word for awhile, well, there are other things, other hobbies which get me through.

And, perhaps, the story in my head and the story in my friend's head is much more interesting to me and she than anything we could read. 

There is a whole lifetime there, in our minds, after all.


  1. Happy Mothers Day Marion, may your day be special.
    I have tried to email you several times but you gmail account won't work do you have another email account or will you drop me a line at so I can write back.
    Blessings and hugs

  2. Happy Mother's Day marion! Lovely post, I love the photos of Graydon and the babies! Kisses to poor Lucky! As for the not reading part, I love to read, but often just get too busy and weeks go by without a book. Sometimes our focus is just somewhere else. Isn't it great that we change as we go, staying the same all the time would be so boring! xoxo

  3. Funny. Your 'longish' posts always captivate me; holding my full attention. Others don't always. Graydon shares my attitude about my upcoming 58th birthday!!

    Happy Mother's Day. Your family, including Mr. Lucky, is beautiful!

  4. Happy mom’s day, Marion!! What delightful grandchildren. Even with tongue out Graydon looks handsome, full of humor and independent. The twins in the crib looks incredibly tiny … I love that they have twin bears. I think you hit on something about our current culture. We are getting used to bullet form information these days, bit and pieces with nothing too substantial to digest. I, too, escaped into books as a youngster but now there are so many options. But truly there is nothing as deep as a good read that allows the imagination to paint all the pictures within our own minds. :)

  5. Wow! THAT's spOOky as the VERY SAME thing has happened to me and i am and have been considered all my life to be the family "Bookworm!"... i too feel lost with out my salvation, my way of coping with the world... Perhaps there is a message in there somewhere? Love to *You* Marion x

  6. marion, I can't tell you tha last time I finished a book. So many of them have been started yet remain bookmarked ten pages in. I'm not even keeping up with magazines. I used to be a voracious reader. I think I know what gets in my way, but still, I miss getting lost in a good book!

    I know what you mean by feeling a change once hitting sixty. I felt that wat at 50 and soon enough will see how sixty suits me. I do love the types of inner chabges we can actually "feel" the moment they're happening! Well, that is if they're GOOD changes ;)

    I think moving to the coast would do your heart good. And yes, moving is a huge undertaking, my goodness. But what fun you'll have planning!

    The twins look wonderful, and wow, against that purple! I love the intertwined shot.

    Give Lucky a huge hug and smooch from me. His grieving process is sure lasting. I wonder if he needs a rescued friend? :)

    I hope Pony Express gets there soon with the little package I sent you.

    I'll be leaving for Ottawa Wednesday for 5 days. I know it's a million miles from you, but still I'll be able to wave to you from my homeland!

    I hope you had a lovely Mother's Day. I know it's a bittersweet day as it is for me and many others.


  7. Hi Marion. The twins are so dear and their little bassinet is positively angelic. Reading - can't say that has even happened to me. I've had slow downs when I've been very involved with something else but eventually I'm back to plowing through a pile of books. I'm was glad to read that the reading drought was breaking. Spring is here and reading is blossoming anew.

  8. I had written myself a note to wish you Happy Mothers Day as I saw it was the Canadian one coming up and blew it. Tsk. Well it may be late but on the run up to it I was thinking about you alot and what a wonderful mother you are and must be to have. xxx

  9. Carolyn,

    Sometimes Google does that; I have reported it and will see what they have to say about it. There might be something going on with the server. I have another friend who I can't email and she can't email me without it being returned. I still haven't figured this one out, either.

    Email on its way to you! xo

    Annie Coe,

    I hope you had a wonderful time on your little holiday, Annie. Change is a constant, for sure...I just wish I knew what the next change coming up will be. Always want to be prepared, you know, heh! xo


    I think I felt like Graydon for about three years before I actually turned sixty; now that I'm there it's not too bad! It's kind of a relief to get to be sixty and not think about it anymore, hahaha!! xo

    Aka Penelope,

    You're right about how a good long and deep read can be so wonderful. I do remember it and one day I know I will not be able to put a book down before I finish it again. It's ridiculous how I'm looking forward to it...peace of mind shall arrive, I'm convinced. xo

  10. Nollyposh,

    Isn't the feeling of not reading weird? I keep wondering what I'm supposed to learn from it. I am determined to begin a long book this weekend...Jean Auel's new book on the cavebear series. That'll keep my mind engaged! xoxo

    Studio Lolo,

    Have a great holiday, Lolo! I hope you will have good weather on your trip...I believe it is supposed to be good.

    I am waiting to see what our future looks like before I bring in a kitten for Lucky. A kitten here where I live now would be a worry...too many predators live here and a kitten would be a tasty snack. But I think another furry wonder would help him...he's basically afraid to be alone. xo


    Spring is here, too, finally, Annie! I'm working out in the garden today...still cleaning up from the Winter and haven't placed any bedding plants yet, although I have seeded.

    But the plant nursery is open! xo

  11. hi marion, i was just thinking of you the other day, wondering why have you not written/blog for a while. glad you're back and oh those photos are precious! i have been on the same boat as you too as to the reading part. i had a book half read that was left untouched for months and finally finished it in 2 days recently. :)

  12. hello sweetie!

    i am never first to comment here at your blog because i always wait to read your posts when i have TIME, which i wish i had more of. :^)

    so you have decided to move back to the coast and to family? if so, i know you won't regret it. i so long to travel the world, live in italy for a year, toss it all to the wind in bali, and yet...i know i can't leave jess and the little ones for too long.

    mr. ryan won't pose for pictures either. he crunches his nose.

    the twins are so beatiful. i kept looking at the shot of them sleeping entwined, and i imagine that must feel so secure. i imagine they will be bonded for life.

    my heart goes out to lucky. he and you will miss nate in the yard, in each season. i hope your car was not totalled! :^)

    love love love marion,

  13. Thanks for sharing your experience about book reading. I myself am a buyer and reader of books. Over the years I did not know I had built a library. I guess it comes to our life this distaste for reading.

  14. All Consuming,

    Thank you for your lovely comment,dear Michelle. I try to be a good mom; not always sure I succeed.I think I am a better grandparent, having learned a few things over the years! xo


    I can understand how difficult it must be for you to take time to read right now! You are one busy woman...congratulations on your art show!! I will be visiting your Etsy site soon. I saw a necklace I love!! xoxo


    My posts have been loooong from the very beginning, and many only read when there is time. That's okay...I suffer from verbal diarrhea, I think, heh!

    I wonder what happened to my interest in travelling the world. It's gone, right now, at least. Must be the grandkids.

    Lucky did try to get into the car and scratched it up pretty good. The garage door locked behind him and he got frantic. The door was scratched and bitten and he must have smelled us in the car because he tried to get in, thereby doing quite a bit of damage, although not totalled!!

    It's a nice day today...a gardening day!!! xoxo


    Yes, I've collected enough books for a library as well. Most of them, because of moving again, will be donated to the real library now.

    Once I'm settled somewhere, I'm sure I will become enchanted with books once again!

  15. "Go with the flow" was always my/our motto. If you feel like not reading, do something else!
    For example: I have "The exploration of the Colorado River and its Canyons" by J.W Powell and"The Monkey Wrench Gang" by Edward Abbey sitting here nearby waiting to be picked up and read. (A trip to Lake Powell in lower Utah a few years back sparked my interest in the lower Colorado river, Grand Canyon, and such environs-- a desolate but interesting landscape)

    Our trends now, seems to me, are toward the rebirth of spring and the life forms thus sparked.
    I am pleased, feel well, and breathing the air with my nose twitching as a dog.

    Thank you, my friend.

  16. goatman,

    I remember visiting Lake Powell years ago. It is desolate landscape there, as you say, but I found beauty there as well. It reminds me a great deal of where I live, actually. The Fraser Canyon has some awesome places I've become familiar with, just by living here.

    So happy you are feeling well, Lyle. I love this sentence..."Our trends now, seems to me, are toward the rebirth of spring and the life forms thus sparked." Thank YOU, Lyle!!! xo

  17. I've always loved reading, expect in college. Too much technical stuff, but even then I always had a novel going by the bed to read a page or two before sleep. Right now I find that I am playing too many games on my iPad to read much, but I have been enjoying Jack London's books again. - Margy

  18. oh my but those twins are beautiful!

    You are moving? How did I miss that bit of news? Where are you going?

    I think the wish to read will return - if you have internal struggles, the urge to read subsides so you can concentrate on balancing yourself again. I found that was true for me...

  19. Margy,

    Perhaps you are on to something. Re-reading favourite books was something I did years ago. And Jack London has always held my have many authors I have in my library. Thanks for the hint!

    I'm reading The Land of Painted Caves by Jean's holding my interest, for sure.

    You've experienced a lot of rain recently...I think the weather is supposed to be good for the long weekend coming up...xo


    You are so right, those internal troubles sent me for a loop for awhile and I really felt I should concentrate on those. As a result, we've come to some conclusion as to where we will retire, along with some other changes in our lives.

    We are not moving right away; there are many things to work out before we do. But we have decided to move to Port Alberni, on Vancouver hometown. It feels right, with family right there.

    Thank you for your wisdom, Pauline...xo